25 December 2008

press release: tragic news from up north

thanks to chef bernie
for sharing this

hark, how the bells, sweet silver bells,
all seem to say "throw cares away"

I am God's child (John 1:12)
I am Christ's friend (John 15:15)
I am united with the Lord (1 Cor 6:17)
I am bought with a price (1 Cor 6:19-20)
I am a saint (set apart for God) (Eph. 1:1)
I am a personal witness of Christ. (Acts 1:8)
I am the salt & light of the earth (Matt 5:13-14)
I am a member of the body of Christ (1 Cor 12:27)
I am free forever from condemnation (Rom. 8: 1-2)
I am free from any charge against me (Rom 8:31-34)
I am a citizen of Heaven.. I am significant (Phil 3:20)
I am a minister of reconciliation for God (2 Cor 5:17-21)
I have access to God through the Holy Spirit (Eph. 2:18)
I am seated with Christ in the heavenly realms (Eph 2:6)
I cannot be separated from the love of God (Rom 8:35-39)
I am established, anointed, sealed by God (2 Cor 1:21-22 )
I am assured all things work together for good (Rom 8:28 )
I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit (John 15:16 )
I may approach God with freedom and confidence (Eph 3: 12 )
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Phil. 4:13)
I am the branch of the true vine, a channel of His life (John 15: 1-5)
I am God's temple (1 Cor 3: 16). I am complete in Christ (Col 2: 10)
I am hidden with Christ in God (Col 3:3). I have been justified (Romans 5:1)
I am God's co-worker (1 Cor 3:9; 2 Cor 6:1). I am God's workmanship (Eph 2:10)
I am confident that the good works God has begun in me will be perfected. (Phil 1:5)
I have been redeemed and forgiven (Col 1:14). I have been adopted as God's child (Eph 1:5)
I belong to God
Do you know
Who you are!?

Merry Christmas

24 December 2008

diary of a snowshoveler

December 8:
6:00 PM It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife an I took our hot chocolate and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9:
We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had. Shoveled for the first time ever and felt like a boy again. I did both the driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life.

December 12:
The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment. My neighbor, Bob, tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man. I'm glad he's our neighbor.

December 14:
Snow, lovely snow! 8" last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15:
20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly, we
aren't in Alaska, after all.

December 16:
Ice storm this morning. Fell on my butt on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like crazy. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel.

December 17:
Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought
a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20:
Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of the stuff last night. More shoveling. Took all day. Snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22:
Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white stuff fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt until August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to go to the bathroom. By the time I got undressed, went, and dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter, but he says he's too busy. I think he's is lying.

December 23:
Only 2" of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What, is she nuts. Why didn't she tell me that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's lying.

December 24:
6" more snow packed so hard by snowplow, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the guy who drives that snowplow, I'll drag him through the snow. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was busy watching for the snowplow.

December 25:
Merry Christmas. 20 more inches of the -#2$&# slop tonight. Snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's an idiot. If I have to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" one more time I'm going to kill her.

December 26:
Still snowed in. Why did I move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27:
Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze.

December 28:
Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in. She's driving me CRAZY!!!!

December 29:
10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it will cave in. That's the silliest thing I've ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30:
Roof caved in. The snow plow driver is suing me for a million dollars. The wife went home to her mother. 9" predicted.

December 31:
Set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.

January 8:
1 feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed?


author unknown

a product warning for apple ipod users everywhere
revenge of the parents on their kids and all their fancy whiz-bangs

we've had snow now for 11 days, which you would know if you've been following along with the blog.

the snow started to melt today, and the ice pack became a slushy, chunky mess. bumpy as all get-out. shook us to the core for the hour-long drive all the way to grandma's house for christmas dinner.

about halfway there, all the bumping and jostling caused my daughter's ipod to shuffle--you know that cool feature which changes the song when you shake the ipod? well, the car shook so hard that the music skipped on the ipod.

now we know our kids, with all their modern technology, can enjoy the torment our parents endured when we, as kids, caused our parents' long-playing records to skip by causing the needle to bounce.

needle? lp? i can hear my daughter asking right about now. . .

22 December 2008

21 December 2008

i'm dreaming of a white christmas. . .

well, the weather outside is frightful. . .

we are thinking about having our first annual christmas barbecue. . .
but our table is under nearly a foot of snow.

not kidding.

so the barbecue is off, but that won't spoil our christmas altogether.

moira and i went out together in the snow and got our tree. . .

where we got it is a well-kept secret. . .

we braved the snow, and moira even learned a thing or two about snow and how it changes the way one drives. remember the movie cars? she learned the value of the advice turn right to go left.

the tree is up and decorated--likely the first time in her 14 years that we've gotten a tree home,
in the house, and decorated all in the same day.

four days to go.

may your days be merry and bright,
and may all your christmases be white.

if the shoe fits. . .

orders for the type of black leather oxford shoes,
which were thrown at george w. bush in iraq,
have gone through the roof.

click here for the whole story.

20 December 2008

let it snow, part quatre

in the four hours since the last snow depth update,
we have seen an additional two inches of snow.
and you pansies on the east coast think
we know nothing about the white stuff. . .

let it snow, part troix

in the four hours since we came home from home depot today,
we have accumulated nearly 5 inches of snow.
The street is deep with the white stuff.

(our car, after 4 hours)

(the neighbor's, across the street)

the flakes are coming down relentlessly, as you can see by the pix.

and the forecast calls for 6 inches more of the stuff. today.

we've had snow and ice now for a full week,
and it looks like we're in for a white christmas.
this'll be the longest cold snap since 1978.
remember that?



12 December 2008

grinch update

the owner of the towing company has agreed to refund $165 to the woman, and donate $500 to raphael house, a local shelter for women and children who are victims of domestic abuse. . .but only after being asked to by the apartment community where the car was almost towed and then dropped. . .

is this enough to change your mind on the poll? cast your vote accordingly.

for the geekazoid in all of us

yes, you can get a dvd projector/home theater projection system
which looks like r2-d2, complete with a remote which is
a miniature of the millennium falcon.
it'll cost you 17,000 galactic credits
(or $2,500 usd), but it's übercool.

click the picture to see r2-d2 in action.
it'll take you to .5 past lightspeed.

11 December 2008

you're a monster, mister grinch
your heart's an empty hole

neither a bloody face nor a deputy's plea could stop a tow-truck driver from doing what he's paid to do. the clackamas county sheriff's office said a wilsonville woman fled her apartment monday night after getting assaulted by her boyfriend. with blood running down her face, she got in her car and sped across the parking lot to her grandmother's place, where she called 911.

the woman provided a statement to the responding sheriff's deputy and then stepped outside to find her car getting towed. the tow driver would not leave the car without making the woman pay a "drop fee."

"i explained to the tow driver that the woman was the victim of domestic violence," deputy wes hall told the oregonian newspaper. the deputy told him there was no place to park, so she left the car with its four-way flashers going, because she was trying to get away.

the deputy's arguments failed to persuade.

the driver, who works on commissions, was completely within his rights to tow the car or charge a drop fee to leave it, said charles white, general operations manager for retriever towing. the amount the woman paid has not been disclosed, but white said the fees can run as high as $160.

"the deputy has no right to tell him to drop the car without charging a fee," said white.

yeah. so much for the spirit of christmas, mister white.


vote on the poll at the left. . .

the perfect man and woman

thanks to cycledon for sharing this.
thought it worth passing on.