one of these days, alice, pow, right to the kisser

the three Ls of real estate. . .and an F

localizzazione, localizzazione, localizzazione. . .e una ferrari

buy a house, get a ferrari f40

nytimes.com

excuse me, officer, part deux

\

jaguar xf police car launched. . .

what municipality has the funds to buy that car in these times?

edmunds inside line

bueller? bueller?

would you buy a house from this man? 

cameron frye's house is for sale.

50 bucks is 50 bucks, and economics is economics.

I recently asked my friends' little girl what she wanted to be when she grows up. She said she wanted to be President some day. I asked her, "If you were President what would be the first thing you would do?"

She replied, "I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people."

"Wow.what a worthy goal," I told her, "But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that. You can come over to my house and mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $50 to use toward food and a new house."

She thought that over for a few seconds, then she looked me straight in the eye and asked, "Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?"

lost in translation. . .somewhere between incommunicado and oblivion

a guide to answering machine messages, part 1.

recorded outgoing message: "if you are a solicitor, please hang up. if not, please press 1 and leave a message."

translation: "we are screening the call. if you are selling something, we are just too wimpy to pick up the phone and say no to you."

clams got legs!?

i'll take my $1000 clams a whack over your $50 clams any day!

sniglet of the day

lava • sneeze

the first action of a lava lamp when turned on; typically the wax at the very bottom heats sufficiently to boil over and out from under the solid wax, but then it solidifies upon striking the cooler water at the top, and remains suspended in place until the whole contents are heated to the melting point.

jäg saknar den tiden hmmm! børk! børk! børk!

translation: i miss those days sometimes. ha.

i don't have a drinking problem. i drink, i get drunk. . .no problem.

the effects of alcohol

6 beers

2 glasses of wine

2 bottles of wine -- shared, of course

too many margaritas

3 kamikazes

7 rum-and-cokes

1 large purple haze

3 martinis

1 bottle of tequila

thanks to hhodges for sharing

why? i mean, really. . .what's the point?

need i say more?

best use of a radial prop engine since WWII

'nuf said.

best use of a V10 to date

dodge viper V10 under a 4-wheel motorcycle. 

prototype only. damn.

excuse me, but does this motorcycle make my butt look small enough?

too much time, too much money. . .

this is a beautiful polluter!

i dare you to show up at a convention of the green party on this thing.

24 cylinders. . .1 per lawnmower engine, 12 on a side, each with a pull cord starter!

imagine the time it must take to (a) fuel it up, (b) tune it up, and (c) change the oil. (never mind (d) start it!). my right arm is already tired!

a gas-powered lawn mower engine produces four times as much pollution as the engine in a typical car. do the math...24 engines times 4 (the pollution each engine's factor over 1 automobile engine) equals 96. . .this contraption emits 96 times the pollutants one car would...

sarah palin would love this thing. anyone remember "drill, baby, drill!"???

can you imagine the torque?

7 cylinders, radial airplane engine, longitudinal propshaft. rev the engine or accelerate too quickly, and the bike will try to lie down on one side.

bloody uncomfortable ride, too. imagine leaning to one side all the time to compensate for the torque. . .

my back muscles are aching already. 

FIVE!!!!!!!

tiger woods could take a lesson from this guy.

". . .in golf, honesty is more important than victory. It's a tough lesson to learn, but here's hoping he gets accolades -- and, perhaps, some sponsorship deals -- that more than make up for the victory he surrendered."

yahoo! sports blog

scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the fandango?

click the pic

here's a whole new definition of speed.

fake race vehicle seized with nearly a ton of cocaine

nytimes.com

just saying the name of the volcano in iceland causes seismic shifts

eyjafjallajokull.

try saying it 3 times quickly without stammering.

and i want to know. . .how does the ash know to stay inside the lines? 

i mean, how can it stay in eastern scotland and not west, 
or southern ireland and not north?