2. avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
3. for high blood pressure sufferers--simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure on your veins. remember to use a timer.
4. a mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
5. if you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. then you'll be afraid to cough.
6. you only need two tools in life--wd-40 and duct tape.. if it doesn't move and should, use the wd-40. if it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
7. if you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.
daily thought: some people are like slinkies - not really good for anything but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.